My Trip to the Book Store

Bored, no work, nothing to do but masturbate, tired of the books on my bookshelves that I have already read through, so I decided to go to my local Barnes and Noble that resides in one of the most conservative neighbourhoods in Texas and find some new books to read about liberalism, atheism, evolution, vampire romance, or whatever else may have caught my attention. While there, I came across a section of books labelled ‘Current Affairs.’

Most of it was books I had seen over and over again, ranging from The Audacity of Hope by President Obama to something about Sarah Palin being an idiot like usual. On a side-note, I don’t see why people still bother with Palin. She’s old news; she’s not even fun to laugh at any more.

While browsing through the section for something to quench my thirst for knowledge, I came across a specific book that made my eyebrow raise by a specific person that makes nothing of mine raise except my stress level.

On the top shelf, with its shiny, jet-black cover and blood red letters was Ann Coulter’s new book Demonic. At first, I thought it was an autobiography, but apparently the rest of the title was How the Liberal Mob is Endangering America. Like all of her other books that try to ‘debunk’ or ‘refute’ beliefs held by liberals, or at least anyone that she doesn’t like, I decided I would like to be a masochist for a few seconds and read a few pages to see what the far-right has been up to these days other than shooting up Norwegian camps filled with teenagers. Boy, was that a huge mistake. I literally opened the book to the first page that my fingers fell in between and started reading at the first paragraph that came into view.

Just that one paragraph was more than enough to make me want to bash my brains in with a rusty pickaxe. I don’t particularly remember what the chapter was even about; all I remember was the urge to hit my head against the nearest brick wall until the stupid went away. So that no one thinks I am lying about the stupid I am referring to, I decided to take a picture of said pickaxe-to-brains worthy paragraph to show other people the idiocy that is the right-wing and their propaganda.

In case the picture cannot be read, here is the paragraph I was talking about.

‘The first exception to Americans’ abhorrence of mob action came in the sixties. The civil rights movement gave mobs a halo. Disgust with Jim Crow laws overcame Americans’ natural aversion to disorder. At the outset, the civil rights movement consisted of peaceful citizens battling mobs that were oppressing blacks – mobs that were, as always, led by Democrats. Orval Faubus, Bull Connor, George Wallace, and the Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan – Democrats all.’

She might as well just say, ‘These people called themselves Democrats a long time ago and were against blacks when political parties believed in completely different things than they do today, therefore all modern Democrats are bad people and against blacks,’ even though almost ninety-percent of all blacks vote Democrat.

What Ann Coulter doesn’t seem to know, or refuses to accept, is that before the Civil Rights Act of 1964, the Democrats were the conservative party and the Republicans were the liberal party. After that act, the parties switched platforms after a series of events and disagreements over policy and ideology. If one were to talk to some senior citizens who were Democrats back in the good ol’ days, they will most likely say how they switched parties when the Republicans became the conservatives, because back in the good ol’ days, the Democrats were the conservatives. Either Ann Coulter is that historically illiterate, which would not be surprising one bit, or she is purposely deceiving her historically illiterate audience to try to demonise the Democratic Party, because she knows that her audience is the type that will believe almost anything without any proper evidence as long as it fits in with their preconceived notions, hence why most conservatives are creationist Christians, including Ann Coulter.

But Ann Cuntler is not the only face-palming fun that I had while at the book store. Right under her/it were the Glenn Beck books about the same stuff; only difference is that they had a slightly less unattractive conservative on the cover.

Along with the usual rhetoric about how liberals are evil and how President Obama is going to ruin the country somehow by implementing this horrible thing called socialism, I noticed his book Common Sense: The Case Against an Out-of-Control Government, Inspired by Thomas Paine.

Apparently, what America’s favourite class-clown doesn’t seem to realise is that Thomas Paine was a hardcore liberal that spoke out against the ‘free market’ and wanted government regulations over corporations to make sure that they did not become too powerful. Paine saw government as a necessary evil, but saw that everyone deserved a free education and help from the government and that all social programmes would be paid for by taxes. If one thought that Thomas Paine was in any way, shape, or form like Glenn Beck or was at all similar to a conservative at the beginning of this entry, I suggest actually reading some of Paine’s works, especially Agrarian Justice and The Necessity of Taxation. After reading those, go listen to one of Beck’s radio shows, since he’s no longer on Fox News, and see if you can refrain from laughing when he tries to claim that Thomas Paine was the equivalent of a modern-day conservative.

But wait, that’s not all!

I had even more fun in the ‘Current Affairs’ section when I came across this little gem of right-wing idiocy. This one was right next to Ann Coulter’s book, so I think we all know where this is going.

This one is called Revolt! How to Defeat Obama and Repeal His Socialist Programs, A Patriot’s Guide by Dick Morris and Eileen McGann.

I love how it’s apparently ‘patriotic’ when one goes against President Obama’s supposed socialism, but when it was against President Bush’s fascism, it’s damn near treason.

I have always wanted to ask this to a conservative who actually thinks that President Obama is a socialist/communist/Marxist/whatever-other-terms-the-right-uses-to-scare-its-sheeple, but could you please give me an example of President Obama wanting to implement socialism in America?

He lowered taxes and is going to keep them there for another two years; he’s caved to almost every Republican demand when it comes to the economy; he watered down the healthcare bill so much that it might as well have never existed; he constantly is putting conservatives in office over liberals and progressives. I need an example, please. I guess the closest one can come to socialism with President Obama is how he wants to…I honestly don’t know.

Now, I’m not the biggest fan of President Obama, but I would sooner vote for him than any candidate the GOP has been lining up for us to point and laugh at.

So yes, that was my adventure to the book store. In the end, I got a book by Paul Krugman in order to wash away the stupid.

Amendment as of the 28th of July

I headed back to the same Barnes and Noble a few days later to find a book that had to do with religion/atheism, but instead I came across another piece of conservative propaganda and stupidity in the ‘Current Affairs’ section again; I think the stupid just draws me to itself so that I may mock it. Right next to Glenn Beck’s Common (Non)Sense was another one of his self-pwning pieces. This one was called The Original Argument: The Federalists’ Case for the Constitution, Adapted for the 21st Century. In other words, ‘I’m going to slant history to favour my side as much as I can to sway gullible sheep into agreeing with me.’

Glenn Beck does not seem to have any understanding of American history, which is completely understandable seeing as how he has no understanding of what Thomas Paine actually stood for, because although the Federalist Party could be loosely construed to be similar to modern conservative values in some fields, the Federalist Party were in favour of just that, a federal power, hence the freaking name. I thought Glenn Beck wanted less federal power, isn’t that why his latter mentioned book is about how we need to stop the ‘out-of-control’ federal government? As with Ann Coulter, either Glenn Beck knows this, that the Federalist Party were for a stronger federal government and the Anti-Federalists were for more state control (which is something that I thought conservatives like Glenn Beck wanted in America today), and he is purposely deceiving his audience, or he doesn’t know anything about the history of the country he was born in and claims to love. At this point, I’m still unsure as to which one is more likely.